I haven't written a post on my daily adventures in a while. It's not that my days are dull or anything, I'm still as full of verm and vigour as I was before. The problem is that I've literally been drowning in what we tend to call "Life." I've had weeks filled with past papers, ink blotches all over my hands and frustrating back and forths with girls over feelings, like I don't have anything better to do with my time. Honestly, if I could trade shoes with a 6 year old and not have to think about anything more than the next mud pie I'm going to bake, I'd be a happy man. I won't even get into what's cutting back in the Sithole residence because that's a post for another day but let's just say things aren't the smoothest. Just last weekend I ended up misplacing my phone. On a Sunday afternoon. All because my mind was overloaded. I need to find a steady rhythm again. I used to do a bit of school and a bit of work and I'd be set. These last two weeks have been devoid of work and that's set me askew. When you're away from certain circles, it gives you time to process certain things. The only downfall to this is that it cuts into the time one can spend with their friends.
But the main reason behind this post is what's been going on in my head, mainly the area that deals with certain dormant feelings. I don't like feelings. I think they can be rather tedious and a waste of time and we'd all be better off with less of them. On the other hand though, I think that they're fun things to work with from time to time. I'm a person set up to love and if you took that from me, I don't know where I would eventually be. I'm a little hypocritical and that's okay because this is my blog and I can say whatever pile of steaming brown I want. I'm usually a character that doesn't like competition. I don't think that it's fun at all.
I've always had a certain amount of opposition when it comes to the girls I'm interested in. From jealous exes to pretty boss DJs, I've done it all. This time though, things are a little different. My ideal relationship situation with a girl would be that we just enjoy each other's company. We hook up, go through the motions when the opportunity arises and then we leave things there, picking up where we left off the next time we're together. No questions, no emotions, just fun. That's all I want, fun. I've had fun in relationships before, my last one was a great laugh but that was a completely different kind of fun compared to this. This here is taboo. This is something we rightfully shouldn't be doing. The fact that we see each other more than the twice a week limit is already reason enough to call it quits and erase it from memory but let's be honest, where's the fun in that? Where is the fun in playing by the rules? Have we ever really done that? Sure we like to mess each other around and push and pull to find a reaction but is it wise this time? So much has happened since the last time, we're two completely different people now. We're gonna bite a lot harder this time.
Haha I'm tickled pink just writing this. I don't know what'll happen in the next few days. Maybe I'll wake up thinking I should settle down, become an upstanding citizen and find myself a nice winter girlfriend. Or maybe I'll keep going as I am, with no set course or plan of action except to draw happiness from any situation that presents its self. The pressure I felt just this morning has dissipated and I feel like I could do with a bit of adventure. How hard can it be?
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