Give Me My Moments Back

These new people. These new characters with all their things that make them who they are. These new faces, they don't know much about me. I feel like I've not done myself any justice. I've squashed my passions. I've not given them the wings they need to fly. I've not given them the power they need to help define me. To them I'm just a guy who has vague interests in the mundane and that's it. That's where he ends. What moves him? What gets him happy? What makes him sad? A guy with no cares for anyone or anything.

That's not me. I have passions. I have fears. I have goals. I have a life so rich in colour that sometimes I literally cannot fathom just how brilliant it all could be. Being thankful is something I never stop being. My passions run deep. This face has been lit up by discussing things that flow through my veins. The feeling of being in my element is one I'll never tire of. I shine like a million watt bulb when I'm discussing music. Come to me with your collected pieces of the written word and I'll understand your soul. Show me the visual pieces that move you and I'll be moved along too. I love nothing more than to control the room. My mission in any situation is to add colour to the walls. I love nothing more than making people laugh. I am that who I am.

There's this feeling people give off these days, like it's wrong to actually care about things. It's wrong to be moved. It's wrong to be set differently. I won't lie, for a while now I've unconsciously been playing into that and no wonder I've been as much of a miserable git as I have. It's like we wear a uniform. That's not me. That's never been me. Ask those that truly know me and they'll tell you that I'm nothing like how I've been these days. I've gotten so good at lying to myself. If there's one thing that has given rise, power to this creative mind, it's my ability to turn the negatives into positives. It's the ability to push through with what I love when it makes no sense to anyone else. When the rest think I've gone around the loop, that's when I bring out the strings that control the puppetry, that's when things turn around.

I've not felt inspired and that's the problem. I've just been so caught up in everyone else's ideologies that I've kinda forgotten mine. I'm better than this. I'm better than all of it. I'm about to make amends.