We live next door to the most loudest people this planet has ever harboured. My neighbours only speak at 100 000 decibels and I'm beginning to think that they only do it when they're at the point closest to my window.
There is this little girl, about 3 or 4 years old and she's been to my house because of some stupid reason or another and every time she comes over, I make it my duty to make her cry. I know this may sound harsh, an old man like me making a little child cry but I feel that I have every reason to. Any time they let her loose in the garden, the little siren will scream and squeal so loud and so menacingly that I've often woken up early in the morning to see if Armageddon isn't taking place. This girl is so loud that I preferred the chickens that the old lady used to have because at least I could kill those if they ever dared wander over the fence.
Then there's her dad. He's the kind of person that shouts down the phone as that'll help get his message across faster and further, in a bid to make the most use of his airtime. I've heard him speaking on the phone, from his kitchen, which is quite a bit away from my bedroom. If you're the kind of person who has a broken volume button then I really do think you should either go for some kind of counselling or you shouldn't be allowed to breed. I can't deal with loud people. Sometimes it is cool to be big, bold and loud but most of the time I swear speaking at room temperature will not harm your soul.
Next time I go past them, I'm going to discuss the weather with the person living on the other side of their house, whilst listening to the loudest trance music I can find..
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