I hate everything right now, everything.
Its stupid how we spend a huge amount of our time working our asses off and it only takes one small thing to just throw us off, one thig to take our wheels off the rails and send us crashing into a huge wall of CRAP. This should be a time of my life where I am faced with the excitement of being done with this stupid thing called school, this was meant to be my final year and by my understanding for a really long time it really was. I spent a huge amount of time working my ass off and honestly I wouldn't have minded if I failed by my own doings but to not even be granted the chance to actually be put to the test is just terrible, I would be happier eating razor blades.
Honestly this is about a billion times worse than the time I hated life, at least that had no devastating effect in the long run and that was easily fixable but this is my frikin future stolen from me by stupid people who know nt what they were doing to even start with. I've just sat here this week, mostly in my bed cuz that w]is where all the morbidly depressed sit and kinda staring out the window and watching the rain, headphones are broken, musical jukebox did the same so the silence is not my best friend, it just leaves me with my thoughts and it makes nothing better. Anyway hopefully I'll get outof this rutt, accept that I have more to do next year and enjoy the last race of the season, the only thing lifting my shattered spirits right now.
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